Carrie and Danielle - Latest Comments in What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Vanessa Rae — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 13:53:51 -0000

hinders: lack of confidence, lack of sleep and lack of communication.
helps: that I find my husband extremely sexy, that I make time to reflect on my own strengths and sexiness and there's something about monsoon season:)

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

LaKecia — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 09:46:47 -0000

The things that hinders our sex life is sleep. I crave sleep some nights. As a teacher it is all I can do to stay awake most evenings. The thing that helps it is going to bed in a gown, with nothing on up under it coming right out of the shower. That's what makes me feel sexy.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Cindy — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 18:05:35 -0000

I'm not sure about everyone else - but seeing my hubby cooking, or fixing a door or really anything that takes his care and concentration reaaly turns my crank! I can't figure out why every woman at his place of work doesn't fall for him.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Stephanie — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 10:59:35 -0000

Sexual energy is excess energy.

Also it helps if you are getting along with your partner!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

kathy — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 15:53:08 -0000

umm ... a willing participant would help!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

jo mango — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 22:51:22 -0000

when i read all the responses, my heart is just so heavy. i wish i were too busy, i wish i could just turn on the music for some loving...but there is no one in my life. i'm pretty and i'm fun and i'm only 55..and still, i'm just so alone. reading all of this is just painful. it seems for everyone, making time is the issue. for some of us, it's that there isn't anyone out there for us. believe me, i would find the time.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Emily-Sarah — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 19:15:32 -0000

I need to utilize the grandparents more as babysitting help. And Isabel, you're right -- it IS unfair to me too. :-)

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Carrie McCarthy — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 23:06:28 -0000

may that day come soon.

Carrie

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Bridget — Sat, 31 May 2008 23:19:24 -0000

What sometimes hinders my sex life is a past bad relationship, particularily if the whole relationship seemed to be based on sex. Sometimes it is hard to get rid of the image of that slimy,cheating guy who never cared about having a conversation with me when I am having wonderful sex with my lovely husband. I am still waiting for the day (it has been 15 years so far)when his name and face never appear in my mind again.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Buffy — Sat, 31 May 2008 20:52:03 -0000

The TV--total hindrance; it's not sexy but my husband swears he can't go to sleep without it.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

kerrymac — Sat, 31 May 2008 20:49:40 -0000

I notice huge drops in our libido that seem to reflect the chaos levels in our lives. If we are busy, stressed and the kids are acting up...sex is the last thing we have energy for. When we keep it simple, spend quiet family times, and keep the house mellow sex is more likely to be on the menu. I agree with Carrie that it needs to be added to the 'to do list' I also find some scents helpful...for some reason Karma from Lush is very sensual. I keep one of their solid shampoos in my undie drawer and it gives everything a nice light scent.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Channing — Sat, 31 May 2008 19:04:33 -0000

Hinders: the voices of disapproval from my upbringing.
Helps:The increasing wisdom of knowing myself and expressing that authentically.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Beth C. — Fri, 30 May 2008 21:50:13 -0000

We have two Great Danes. We call the younger one the "Sex Puppy" because she gets really upset if we hug, kiss or make advances toward one another in her vicinity. She'll whine and wedge herself between us. It's pretty cute.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Beth C. — Fri, 30 May 2008 21:44:08 -0000

I have always loved sex with my husband. Ever since the very first time. It has never taken much help for me to be inspired to connect with him in that way. As we've gotten into our thirties, his total lack of a sex drive has really hindered having a great sex life.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Isabel — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:36:04 -0000

Unfair to you too! :)

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

karryn — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:08:29 -0000

Brilliantly said, Lisa!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Carrie McCarthy — Fri, 30 May 2008 15:58:53 -0000

I can relate. Sometimes we forget our dog is the room and she starts to scratch the bed at the most inopportune time!!

Carrie

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Carrie McCarthy — Fri, 30 May 2008 15:55:11 -0000

baby sitter?

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

SRead — Fri, 30 May 2008 15:45:07 -0000

An Empty Nest has helped to put "more time together" on the "To Do List"! Good health and energy to spare sure helps....and as Molly suggests thinking about all that you appreciate and "dig" about your loved one.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Ngonzi Truth Crushshon — Fri, 30 May 2008 15:01:15 -0000

I am a Miranda Sex in the city kinda gal....so it is what's on the inside-the emotionally soft side of the guy that speaks to my soul! He has to be emotionally available to listen and really hear my needs before I speak them...or attentive to my body language...and also able to understand the deeper meaning of why I'm feeling the way I feel and when I tell him how I'm feeling he responds accordingly. I LOVE A MAN THAT IS IN TOUCH WITH HIS EMOTIONS AND ALSO SENSITIVE TO MY NEEDS!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Ngonzi Truth Crushshon — Fri, 30 May 2008 14:54:31 -0000

LOVE within a Committed Relationship....openness and honesty!!! Genuine concern outside of the bedroom is a turn on.

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Lisa D. — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:57:23 -0000

sweet!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

Lisa D. — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:55:43 -0000

I feel for you! Sex is awesome isn't it?
Women are complex creatures sexually! Oddly, sex for women doesn't always have to do with the physical act.
Men see a hot thing and 'it's all she wrote' where as a woman's sexuality might be affected from something that happened last week (or years ago)! Sex truly starts in the mind. Plus, she has to be comfortable in her own skin. I think I like sex so much because I know my own body and am comfortable with it.
On the knowledge end of things - I've learned tons from Berman & Berman. Good luck!!!

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

RecollectedStephanie — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:31:38 -0000

Helps: remembering that making the "effort" is the same as making the effort to unwrap birthday presents.

Hinders: pouting instead. Or not paying attention. Or declaring (even silently) that I don't WANT any presents! (Less likely as I get older and more grateful in this life.)

Re: What helps or hinders you from having a great sex life?

karryn — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:27:04 -0000

I'm sorry, but that really made me laugh!