Carrie and Danielle - Latest Comments in What do you regret?

Re: What do you regret?

andar909 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 20:20:42 -0000

hi, andar here, i just read your post. i like very much. agree to you, sir.

Re: What do you regret?

Vanessa Rae — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 12:19:10 -0000

a few...
not believing that sometimes rejection is a blessing... going around in circles instead of trusting the lesson the first time... not believing that I am enough... not giving them the finger... giving them the finger instead of speaking my mind... comparing myself to others... putting the cult of fame on a pedestal while knowing I'm truly happy with my simple yet abundant life... the secrets I promised to keep but didn't... not laughing at myself more... not taking myself more seriously... apologizing for things I wasn't sorry for... walking on eggshells... not dancing despite the rain.

Re: What do you regret?

Nicole — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 13:50:46 -0000

I regret not going back to school at taking Marketing. I regret not having more fun in the last 7yrs. I regret not believing in my self 10 yrs ago to just go for it.

I don't regret that I'm doing those things now. Better late then never, so I've moved on to bigger things.

Re: What do you regret?

Shug — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 18:48:40 -0000

Haven't ever really been a person who "believes" in regrets, even for the things that caused pain and suffering, because I've learned to value the lessons and learning derived from it all. But thinking about it, I do regret the times I have/do not stand up for myself, have/do not listen to my heart, have/do not ask for what I need. In this regard I have and sometimes continue to do myself a disservice. And if I'd been more aware of these things, I actually could've avoided some of the things I have denied regretting.

Re: What do you regret?

Shug — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 18:37:01 -0000

first, I have to say, i followed your story as written - to the front yard as a baby - and thought perhaps since you never looked back you just kept on running until you found another place to live (w/o a spooky basement) :) I laughed outloud when reading your add on. but . . . seriously, I found, too, that living by myself and traveling by myself have both been incredibly empowering things for me. I only lived by myself for a year or two my whole life (46 now) and was truly my best self then. The challenge has come in living with someone else now, striving to be my best self now. It is hard sometimes. Actually, it's often difficult.

And about traveling . . . I so much love sharing experiences with people and travel is a great way to explore and discover things together. How wonderful it was to explore solo travel and discover that I could have a good, no GREAT time in my own company. By internalizing more and sharing less in the moment (by way of a companion), I felt like I received a cherished gift that was mine alone. I still enjoy traveling with other people, don't get me wrong, but stepping past my hesitation to go it alone sometimes has always, always held huge rewards and I am dedicated to doing and reaping more.

Re: What do you regret?

Elaine — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 09:23:20 -0000

Thanks for the kind words. I know I did learn a lot of valuable lessons-just wish it wouldn't take so long to "pay" for the leaning. Have a great day. Elaine

Re: What do you regret?

MarieLeona — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 07:16:03 -0000

In the best of times, I try to live without regrets...nevertheless there are certain moments, person, and event I wish I would have lived, loved, and participated differently but my motto in life is: "Change one thing, change everything!" Everything happens for its purpose and sometimes the purpose is not always so visible. I believe that I am where I need to be.

Re: What do you regret?

Pam — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 06:42:53 -0000

I regret letting my weight climb over the years and then hindering different things I wanted to accomplish and also holding me back from taking chances. It often dictated who I was and also brought so much negativity and self loathing into my life. I have now lost over 140 pounds and I can’t believe the difference in my attitude, courage to try new things, and over all happiness. So in one way I regret that but I guess I would not have this wonderful feeling of accomplishment and pride in myself for taking charge and becoming healthy and happy.

Re: What do you regret?

marn — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 01:35:15 -0000

I 'regret' trying to please so many people for so many years. Enough of that.
Also not traveling more in my 20's.
Oh, and keeping up a high maintenance relationship with a girlfriend who I allow to suck my emotional, physical, and mental energy. I obviously get something from keeping the toxicity up, otherwise, why would I keep it up?! :-(

Re: What do you regret?

Beth C. — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 00:23:13 -0000

I regret not having had a baby in my twenties.

Re: What do you regret?

Colleen Overman — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:26:58 -0000

I regret not exploring my interests more in college. I was lucky enough that my parents were able to pay for my education, yet I was so concerned with my perceived problems that I didn't really enjoy it as much as I could have. I was too scared to follow many of my dreams (including to be a writer) because they often didn't appear practical, at least that what I believed then. All of that said, it makes my liberation in creating my career now even sweeter.

Re: What do you regret?

karen — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:26:43 -0000

thank you for that sensitive suggestion DL. regrets do have gifts, a learning to learn. i am happy to have something to say to my regrets instead of feeling sadness.

Re: What do you regret?

Sharyl — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:15:42 -0000

At 51, I'm happy to say I have relatively few regrets. The biggest one is a whopper though and I didn't see anyone talking about it here. I regret not having a child. I've always justified it by saying it was never the right time or I wasn't with the right person (I've never been married either). Looking back, I was just too scared and/or selfish - too afraid of what I perceived I would be giving up, my freedom.

One other big regret is not staying in Los Angeles to pursue a career in film. I got the degree, a desirable "in" with one of the major studios, a job on a popular TV show and then I threw it all away and moved to Lake Tahoe for adventure and scenery. If I'd stayed, I'm sure I would be better off financially now. But who really knows?

I also regret not saving any money for retirement! start young! If you're lucky you will make it to retirement age and need it.

Re: What do you regret?

Karel — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:02:27 -0000

So, so true... but then the next question could be... Why is hindsight so much easier than foresight??? It certainly was a growing part of your journey.

Re: What do you regret?

Jane — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 22:58:52 -0000

I regret worrying so much about what other people think.

Re: What do you regret?

Caroline — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:59:15 -0000

That sounds amazing. I travelled in Africa and overland from London to Singapore (making my very slow way home) and to be able to do that and write would be my idea of the perfect way forward...

Re: What do you regret?

Caroline — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:57:55 -0000

Thanks for that - I sometimes need to remind myself it is definitely all the right decision - amazing how quickly you forget the tiredness and emptiness that comes with climbing up through those gruelling professional careers. I cook as a pastry cook a few days a week now and the distinction can move me to laughter.

Re: What do you regret?

Caroline — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:48:26 -0000

Teach cooking. Keep travelling. Write. Live by the sea at least once and in the mountains once. Feel extraordinary instead of constrained. The thing I'm discovering is that all of these things are right there and possible, and it was myself and my own fear that made them seems so unachievable. Funny - you see the same feelings written down by people who have gone through this process over and over but it's not until you feel it yourself that you really begin to believe it.

Re: What do you regret?

chris — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:08:44 -0000

I'm with you on the mother thing, Karel. By the way love the spelling of your name. So unique! I wish I would have spent more time with my son! They grow so fast and you can't go back for do overs or get that time back.

Re: What do you regret?

Tara — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:06:32 -0000

I'm the younger sister to a mean big sister. I moved to France when I was 18, and out of the blue one day she rang me up and apologised for being such a bitch. She was shopping one day and witnessed a big sister being horrible and cruel to her little sister - she felt compelled to go over and say something to the older girl, and then she realised it was exactly how she had treated me. We're totally cool now, I've never been one to hold a grudge, but I know she regrets how poorly she treated me.

Re: What do you regret?

Tara — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 17:57:00 -0000

I've always been pretty happy with my lot, but I knocked back a great job opportunity when I was twenty - I often wonder how things would have been different if I took that path - a bit like 'Sliding Doors'.

Re: What do you regret?

andrea — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 17:20:21 -0000

The biggies
I regret the time lost on people whose intentions were less than good
I regret not staying in London and, instead, running off to Spain
I regret being hurtful to a gentle soul
I regret not jumping when my heart said "this is your time"
I regret not being secure enough in my 20's to blaze my own path and always needing to follow and be with others

the smallies
I regret stealing back the doll that I sold at a garage sale
I regret trying my first cigarette at 19 and then smoking for 6 years
I regret ironing my hair with a clothing iron (in the 80's)

Re: What do you regret?

andrea — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 17:04:39 -0000

I have to go and dry off my keyboard now too...what a sweet connection between you two. I have just sent my Mum the link to this website and asked her to sign up for the daily question because of these messages. Thank you.

Re: What do you regret?

Ramona — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 16:42:35 -0000

Thank you for sharing. I will always remember you when I pray.

Re: What do you regret?

Ramona — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 16:35:38 -0000

I, too, majored in English Literature and Language! I regret that I did not pay more attention! lol... I am pretty well read in spite of my lazy ways and myriad last minute paper-writing sessions. :-) Anyway, I love your idea of a book journal. I just started "really" reading Virginia Woolf again a few days ago. I have always wanted to go back and catch those things I missed.
One problem: I am thirty, and I still have not figured out where a well-read English Lit major fits into society. Please don't tell me I can be a teacher or a copy editor--I have done both. Besides responding every question posed my Danielle and Carrie, I am not sure I fit anywhere.

Oh! Another thing I regret is not choosing a major that qualifies me to do something... Please don't take offense to that statement; I really love how thoughtful and contemplative a life of reading has made me. :-)