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Many years later when my husband reached a significant career goal, he wanted to get his ear pierced to recognize the freedom he felt. I had the diamond reset into a stud and presented it to him - he loved it and it really suited him and the occasion it represented. When we celebrated our 40th anniversary this year, I gave him a garnet stud to replace the diamond (ruby or garnet is the gift for the 40th but the ruby's were all to pink, so I opted for the dark red of the garnet, which also happens to be his birthstone). It never really felt right though, so just tonight, I presented him with the diamond stud and said it really belonged to him now. He just beamed as he happily slid it into place.
We celebrated our 22nd anniversary in April and are happier now than we were all those years ago. Over the years we've grown together and learned together. We still argue about things but we've gotten better at listening to each other. I'm convinced that we survived those early years on sheer stubborness alone (neither one of us likes to admit being wrong). Luckily once we got passed those early obstacles, we realized that we are each other's best partner. We balance each other out and support each other. I'm glad we didn't give up in those early years. The rewards have been more than worth it.
A recent mistake that I loved the moment it happened, was getting a little too cocky at the Roller Rink this past February (I was never much of a skater, I hadn't been on skates of any kind in a decade at least). I totally wiped out and bloodied up my knee, all because Justin Timberlake came on and I decided to bring sexy back.
I would call this a favourite because I hadn't risked that kind of mistake in a long time. It made me feel alive.
I try not to use the word mistake or failure cause they fill you with the negative connotation of regret. Lesson learned is more gentler....lol
In my book there is no such thing as a favorite mistake... As a rule I find them embarrasing, but that is just my hang-up. I will say this: every mistake I have made has been a product of haste or over-analyzing... So, I jave learned there is such a thing as a happy medium. Aaaaaand.... I have learned to listen to the voice in me that sends warnings... when somethng doesn't feel right, I stop. As a rule I don't go through with it... There is my lesson in a nutshell!!!
Cécile
Cécile
I'm learning to voice my concerns no matter how much I don't want to hurt other people's feelings....I have to find words that express what I mean without appearing mean/inconsiderate to others.
I'm learning how to say NO and realizing that I don't need a reason to say NO!!!! I have a choice to say YES or NO....that is why there was a question asked....but I feel like I am being mean when I say NO and don't have a reason. I CAN SAY NO without seemingly being mean.
With this one, I have to argue over the email. At least it takes away the hot headed side. And there are some of her emails I scan for length and basic content and if it's an abusive rant I delete without reading. It's a way to "walk away" on the page.
But any further advice would be welcomed.
Everyone told me I was making a HUGE mistake to even think for one hot second about becoming a mom. Even though I never meant to get pregnant, once I found out that I was, there was absolutely no question I was going to have her. I was 29 and a few years into my career and I just knew it was what I wanted even though I figured I'd be totally on my own and I was scared out of my wits.
Well, things worked out beautifully, ended up marrying her dad and 7 years later, we are still great friends (despite the marriage falling apart). I am so grateful that I made that decision in spite of what everyone said...today I have a gorgeous first grade girl (and her 4 year old brother, too - another "mistake" haha).
And it was a hard choice, I didn't speak to my mom for 5 months of my pregnancy because she was so against my decision. That was really painful. But today, she is the world's most doting grandmother. I think she learned some big lessons from my mistake, too.
My mother always says, "you make a decision based on the information you have today, when the information changes tomorrow, make a new decision."
Another favourite mistake was traveling through Europe on my own. "Mistake" because my naivety got me in some (seriously) sticky situations (let's just say I was happy to come out in one piece!) "Favourite" because I can really say I came out stronger (I survived that!) and more aware of what's important to me.
there's no end in a relationship like this. she behaves abusively toward you, you take it, and neither of you are better off.
sometimes we accept behaviour from others that's only slightly worse than how we treat ourselves. and maybe that's what you could gently look at: is there a part of you that feels you deserve to be treated this way?
i can tell you with all confidence that no one deserves any kind of abuse, period.
you could create a new personal boundary: that no one's allowed to speak to you (or write to you) in a way that makes you feel sad/angry or bad about yourself and what you believe.
sending you love & compassion,
kat
Cécile
PS Kat, your submissions re: what turns you on the other day, were so hot. I actually got a little flushed.
I have let it go now. Have turned my focus toward fashion, clothing and adornemnt since my style statement was done seven months ago. My life has more balance and "rounded outness" ALL the little boxes at the top of this page need time and space to create a life that is fully lived.
Oh and my answer would be different if you asked me my worst mistake.
What I learned is that when the pressure is on, I can and will show up. I learned that my instincts are good and can be trusted. I learned that sometimes a city and a language choose you...not the other way around.
Thank you ladies!
xo
D
Enjoy the ride Pearl!