Carrie and Danielle - Latest Comments in The Ones That Got Away: Reconsidering What We Didn’t Choose

Re: The Ones That Got Away: Reconsidering What We Didn’t Choose

D. — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 17:24:23 -0000

Wow- apparently you never got over a high school mentality of dating... we're here on this earth to experience all kinds of relationships- including friendships. Men and women, boys and girls, gay, straight, bi and asexual people need companionship, compassion,and comradely. Some relationships have an erotic or sexual nature, others don't. Others are brought together by platonic friendship-that fact that people like the company of others, enjoy their qualities, their spirit, the things they have shared interests in or do together. There's enough room in the human heart for all sorts of relationships. Why limit yourself to a belief that men and women can't be friends? Hey, what about bisexual- I guess that they can't be friends with anyone due to that attraction to both genders.....doomed to loneliness, huh? Hey, there are people that believe that people of different races or religions can't friends either- your welcome to your experiences and beliefs, but I hope that some day you might meet someone who likes you and you like them- without necessarily lusting after them. Friendship is a gift that grows over time and changes- sorry that you never got over so-and-so, or they never got over you, but life is way too short to pine- things don't always work out, but learn something and move on joyously.

Re: The Ones That Got Away: Reconsidering What We Didn’t Choose

carolynn — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 14:38:46 -0000

Interesting article. I've been getting the 2 a.m. e-mails from a couple of married men, as well.

One is an ex boyfriend, the other a boyfriend wanna-be. While I'll admit it's flattering on one level, it's also extremely creepy and kind of pisses me off. The married ex tells me that he's happily married, so WTF...why is he e-mailing me and telling me he still wonders, "what if"? Is he just keeping me on the back burner, just in case things don't work out in his current marriage? I mean, give me a break!

As for the wanna-be...it feels like the same thing. Get your affairs (literally) in order before you invite me into your life. You either want to be with your wife or you don't. Figure it out, handle it properly and honorably, and then we'll talk. And, that's not a guarantee that I'll take you up on your offer either, buddy.

*sigh*

Re: The Ones That Got Away: Reconsidering What We Didn’t Choose

JulieG — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 14:02:20 -0000

I'm going to have to respectfully disagree with you on the idea that it's impossible to have a platonic friendship. It's not common, I admit, for there to be a male-female friendship where neither party is attracted to the other, but it is possible. One of my closest friends is a guy I've known since I was 13. I've never had any romantic feelings for him and he (to the best of my knowledge, and confirmed by his most recent girlfriend) has never had any for me. On the other hand, he's probably my only male friend that falls into this category.