DISQUS

Constance · 1 year ago

I've stopped being curious about why someone doesn't like me. I'm not as curious about
other people's lives. I'm not even that curious about what makes me tick. What I have not
stopped being curious about are my passions: astrology, fashion, literature, moviemaking, the great big wide world, what's happening with the soldiers fighting our wars and what happens to them as they return as veterans.

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Yours is the curiousity that can change the world Constance! Thanks...

DanielleLaPorte · 1 year ago

not being curious about why someone doesn't like you is a great curiosity to let go of!

Kristin_The_Goat · 1 year ago

I've stopped being curious about my husband. We are together so much our days that I feel like I've lived his day as well as my own. I've stopped being curious about gardening ever since I moved into a condo. I can't seem to think of any more, but I will surely think of things as soon as I click send lol

Jess · 1 year ago

I tried to pretend I wasn't, but I'm definitely struggling with my curiousity about sex and romance. Having been with my boyfriend for awhile I'm forgetting what a huge stud he really is haha!
I've also stopped being curious into other ppl's lives, and feel like I'm becoming more self-indulged. So I will try to make a concerted effort to reach out and learn something new about someone new today.

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Can't help but notice there is no "to do" that follows on your struggle with curiousity about sex and romance! Have you described him in your journal recently? Photographed him? One of my favorite intimacy builders is to build your "love map" a la John Gottman. It is really a game where you try to guess things about each other-- what does he fear most? What is his unrealized dream? How does he love to be soothed? Let him do this for you too.

JoeM · 1 year ago

I've lost my curiosity for boats, sailing and water sports. Why spend time on what you can't do. Over time, I've developed an intense curiosity as to why people do what they do, why and how do they make decisions about intensely serious matters and then change their mind a third of the way into the commitment? Why do they chose to act on a whim versus waiting for sufficient information to make a decision? Of course based on the current research, people are most curious about that which they are most afflicted with, which puts me in the middle of the pile I suppose. That only increases my curiosity. I'm also beginning to build an intense curiosity for how we might begin to heal one another without spending huge amounts of money or turning over our need for healing to megalithic corporate enterprises. Our Great-Great-Grandparents could do it, why can't we?

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

You're on a roll! I love your questions- they send me to so many new places to explore.

Lori_from_Texas · 1 year ago

Since I became a mother 10 years ago, I stopped becoming curious about myself...which is what drew me to Style Statement. The moment I realized I had lost touch with myself was when I walked into a large department store to find an outfit for a special occassion. I stood in the doorway and had no idea what I liked anymore. It took me almost 20 minutes and some tears to remember I liked red. So, I am becoming curious about my own life again. What might be possible? I could live my "one wild and precious life." (thank you Mary Oliver)

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Do you know what I love in this poignant comment? The fact that you walked into that store looking for what you liked and NOT what you would look good in!

Leah Graves · 1 year ago

I agree with Danielle. I do not know a lot about my Mom's parents. I've stopped asking. Her Dad passed away when she was in college and her Mom when I was only 5. It seems like a tough topic, so I've stopped being curious. I'm closer to my Dad's side anyway.

Nia · 1 year ago

Hmmmmm, I stopped being curious about starting my own bookstore. Its not that I don't want it - I do, for lots of different reasons. But I guess it seems so overwhelming - finding the space, coming up with start-up costs, etc. It feels lreally daunting. I had been doing alot of research, but somehow lost my steam.

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Oh Nia,
I know there is a passion and a dream behnd your desire for starting that bookstore? That is what i am curious about!

Lisa D · 1 year ago

I'm with Danielle - you think you know your loved ones.
You've heard the stories so many times that you just accept them and move on. I want to ask more questions when I hear those stories...

Licarrit · 1 year ago

I've stopped being curious what other people think of me, AND THAT IS A VERY GOOD THING! I have stopped living my life based on other people's preconceptions and misconceptions of me or even my family. The rest of it, life, I am just a large toddler. The first thing out of my mouth is Why...

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Light the way for all of us Licaritt!

Kirsty · 1 year ago

I've stopped being as curious about the world, and its development as I once was. After graduating university with a degree in international development, I was all fired up about working effectively at the grassroots level in South Asia. People told me they could feel my passion. But that fire, and curiousity to seek knowledge about developing nations and communities fizzled after working in the field and in Ottawa. It's time to start reading and connecting again.

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Fizzled is an interesting word, Kirsty. PUts me in mind of soda fizz that eventually does just run out. But sometimes we can speed up the process when we leave the top off for too long. What do you think?

Cindy - Creative Classic · 1 year ago

I am endlessly curious - that is why I spend a good part of my life in Barnes and Noble and Borders Bookstores. The fact that I am so curious makes it extremely difficult to deal with the routine and mundane aspects of life. If something does not engage my curiousity and creativity, then I have a tough time staying interested. Does anyone have suggestions for making the more mundane aspects of life tolerable?

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Would love to hear what others think about this but here is my two cents that comes from just having read Abby Seixas' Finding The Deep River Within. She talks about the idea of presence and getting curious not about what we do (which is sometimes mundane- like washing dishes) but how we do it...Getting really curious and present to what is happening in our body? What feelings are associated with this activity? What appreciation can we express in this moment, etc...

Cindy - Creative Classic · 1 year ago

Hello Pearl,

Thank you for your response. I am trying her to be "in the moment" more often, but I am such a future oriented person that it can be a struggle. However, reminders such as these always help. Cindy

marn · 1 year ago

Sounds like a good read pearl! :-)
Cindy - I too am like this! (See my post a few below yours).... Embrace it! :-)
What a wonderful gift! The world needs people like YOU (and me) to keep movement! I get very bored, very quickly, but I know that if in my life I am living 'on purpose' then those little things become more enjoyable!
Oh, and you could always read while doing the dishes, etc... LOL!

Cindy - Creative Classic · 1 year ago

Hi Marn,

Thanks for the encouragement. I love being curious, but it certainly can make it difficult to stick with things that I find boring or uninteresting. I like the idea of doing something enjoyable while doing something that is not enjoyable - somehow, I keep forgetting to do that. However, when I do, it definitely makes it easier.

Cindy

Kristen · 1 year ago

I know this sounds silly, but I think there is a way to spice up anything. Reading a new book on my lunch hour is like being in a different place....buying a new mug for my morning commute is nicer than a paper cup....listening to my new ipod music while watching my boys at the hockey arena.... taking a nice bath in the morning BEFORE the craziness starts.....you see...let your creativity flow. Your friend, Feminine Creative

weezie · 1 year ago

I've lost my curiousity about what I would look like if I were 10...20...30...40 pounds thinner (it increases by decade). I only obsess about it now for health reasons - I want to be lithe enough to roll around on the floor with my future grandchildren.

marn · 1 year ago

Great question! I was recently at a course where this question was posed. I have not stopped becoming curious about anything! I am SOOOO curious about everything in life right now, so much that it has been defined as a 'driving need' for me. "ie: Driving Need: I would crawl over broken glass to get it met destructively or constructively!"
I love being curious about life: books, the net, people, home decor, my kids, games, plants, cars, new career, etc, etc... and the best one? Curious about MYSELF! Fun! :-)

Susie Hutchinson · 1 year ago

I suppose I've stopped being curious about my career. It was all I thought about for years. I'll ask myself until it comes to me, what do I want to do with the next five years?

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Maybe "career" is no longer the operative word. What do you want to do with your life and your gifts for the next 5 years? Does that open anything up?

Emily-Sarah · 1 year ago

I've always been curious about my origins but never put action to thought. I was adopted when I was six weeks old by the most wonderful parents -- and I truly have claimed their heritage. Sometimes I forget it isn't mine biologically.

But when I was pregnant, full of a growing baby and wild hormones, I wept one day, realizing that my birth mother experienced none of the positive emotions and happy expectations that I and everyone in my life gave me during that time. It was 1969 and she was sequestered, sent away to a home for unwed mothers. And when I gave birth to my son four years ago (tonight at 7:45 {at a midwife attended homebirth} to be exact!) I had this overwhelming epiphany: Wow! Here is the one and only other person who has EVER been in my life that I'm linked to genetically.

I'm rambling, but my point is that I'm more intrinsically curious about my biological origins as I look into the inquisitive blue eyes of my son (that are the same color as mine that are the same color as my birth mother's {one of the few "nonidentifying" facts I know}). What would happen if I acted on this curiosity and tried to find her? (The NC law changed Jan. 1 of this year, making it a bit easier to do.) I don't know. And maybe it's the unknown that keeps holding me back.

I don't seek a mother or father; those roles are filled. But I would like to tell my birth mother that I'm well, that my childhood was wonderful overall, that I have always been grateful to her and thankful for her selflessness. I would look into her blue eyes and say that I love her for giving me my beginning ... and if she holds any blame or shame, then please, release it!

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Emily-Sarah
Happy birthday to you and your son! Sounds like a lot of love and connection and compassion came into the world with your child.

Emily-Sarah · 1 year ago

Thank you!

Lorrie · 1 year ago

I wonder why I have lost my curiosity about other countries and cultures. Too busy .. too committed? If I change myself, I could consider bringing my professionalism around mindfulness, meditation and yoga to countries who are wanting such teaching. In doing so, I could create new friends and learn abundantly.

rock girl · 1 year ago

I've stopped being curious about other places. I always wanted to travel somewhere, but I was always broke or preoccuppied. There was always a compelling reason to stay home, even though I truly wanted to travel somewhere far away.

Now, I could probably afford to travel if I really wanted to. However, I find that I am content on the west coast - in the mountain trails and especially on the beaches. It's where I belong and I have no desire to be anywhere else. A little local travel is nice, especially on boats, but I no longer want to get lost.

Helen May · 1 year ago

Curiosity is a close cousin of interest. The desire to know and understand is integral to being human and to learning. Knowledge has become confused with information.Most humans learn by doing and being engaged.Many humans who rely on information restrict their activities and their experiences, believing that they already know. We cannot learn when we think we already know! And when we think we know, our creative spirit becomes imprisoned in the absence of discovery and the lack of interest ...............

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

"We can not learn when we think we already know" LOVE THAT!

Michelle · 1 year ago

I've stopped being so curious about why other mamas do things the way they do. I've gotten more curious about about why I do what I do and why is it that I get pulled out of using my values, gut, heart to guide me and validate my choices. I want to follow my curiousity around what will facilitate me being more self-referencing.

Traci · 1 year ago

Pearl, you're a genius.

Personally, I'm terribly proud to say that I am at a curiosity peak in my life. Even the smallest things garner at LEAST a "huh! who knew?" from me. I'm loving it.

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Thank you Traci. Shoulda known C & D enthusiasts would be ahead of the curve!

Kristen · 1 year ago

I'm OK with not being curious these days.......I finally feel that I am now needed to help my sons solve their curious mysteries......and that is very gratifying.

Daniel Gibbons · 1 year ago

I would like to be curious about literature again. I keep making excuses for why I'm not reading more (work, baby, etc...) but the reality is I've just allowed it not to be a priority, and I've let myself forget how important books can be. I used to read at least one novel a week, and I think reading real literature is so critical to one's overall curiosity about the world.

Catharine - Bohemian Classic · 1 year ago

I would like to be more curious about the origins of words. I used to know so much about the etymology of the words I loved; as a child, I loved to read the dictionary. Maybe it's a consequence of using mostly online dictionaries, but I don't open that book and dip into it and wander around like I used to. Maybe I should pick up a new volume of words!

pearl_mattenson · 1 year ago

Daniel and Catherine--books and words--I am right with you. Actually I used to read 3-4 novels a week-and I am lucky now if I read 1 every few months. An author I love for her writing, good stories and interest in words is Carol Goodman- all of her books are winners. See what you think.

Celise · 1 year ago

Funny thing is, I haven't stopped being curious. Being a writer, I see story possiblities in everything I see and hear. If I lost my curiousity, I think I would lose my ability to write.

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